The Ten Second Breakfast

Breakfast rocks. You don’t eat breakfast, you fail. Breakfast is the breakfast of champions.

YOU DON’T NEED REMINDING OF THIS.

It’s in every newspaper at least once a month, telling you that breakfast is the cornerstone of weight-loss, productivity and general all-round awesomeness.

Breakfast-junkies, from Tim Ferriss to Leo Babauta, expound on their aspirational morning routines, which involve getting up at half past two in the morning, meditating, working for eight hours, fixing global warming and stopping wars before a high-energy, low-carb, protein-rich breakfast.

So far so sucky.

YOU need breakfast because if you don’t have it:

• Your stomach rumbles all the way through your morning meetings and the sexy guy from marketing keeps his distance.
• Your breath smells.
• You’re lethargic and slovenly, your work suffers and you lose your job.
• You’re an irritable bastard, losing the love and respect of friends with each minute that passes

NO BREAKFAST = UNEMPLOYMENT and LONELINESS

With breakfast in your life, you have more energy for your work and your friends, the ability to sustain longer love-making sessions, and better breath. You rock.

YOU DON’T EAT BREAKFAST BECAUSE:

• You don’t have time
• You don’t have time
• You get up too late
• You don’t have time

You say:

Hang on a second, I don’t eat breakfast because I’m not a morning eater. I really don’t get hungry until about the middle of the morning.

I CALL BULLSHIT!

You know when you go on holiday, or you’re away on a business trip and staying in a lush hotel that serves just about everything you could want to eat? You know those times? You know how you ALWAYS manage to eat breakfast in those situations?

Yeah, thought so.

SO – HERE’S HOW to make breakfast in less than ten seconds:

1. Open cereal, pour into bowl.
2. Pour on milk.
3. Eat

OR

1. Open oatmeal (porridge where I come from), pour into bowl.
2. Pour on hot water, leave to stand.
3. Eat.

BANG! BREAKFAST.

Viva A New Life Complete With Morning Meal!